Healthy Snacks For Kids Involves More Than Just The Food
What do you think of when you think about snacks for kids?
Do goldfish crackers, cookies, chips, and candy possibly come to mind?
Or any type of packaged processed foods that might make parents cringe but that are the delight of most kids?
No matter how you might try to control your child’s exposure to these types of snack foods, it’s inevitable that your kiddos will encounter them at some point in their lifetimes.
Then what?
Or what happens when you hit the grocery store and your kids lock eyes with a perfectly packaged cereal box or snack food that meets them right at their eye level?
Whatever the scenario, there often comes a point where a child feels more infatuated with snack foods than anything else that might be available, including foods served at family mealtimes.
Common situations I hear from parents might include:
The child who prefers to eat snacks rather than meals
The child who asks for snacks right after mealtimes
The child who repeatedly asks for snack foods
The child who seems preoccupied with snack foods
The toddler who won’t eat dinner but wants snacks
Do any of these scenarios resonate with you? If so, know that you’re not alone.
Snacks can be a tricky issue for parents to navigate, especially snack foods that have often been demonized in our culture.
Many parents find it hard to reconcile the child who loves snack foods with their desire for their kid to grow up healthy.
But what if these things weren’t mutually exclusive?
What if you could take an approach to snacking that not only helps optimize your children’s overall nutrition but that supports the building blocks for a positive relationship with food?
It’s possible, mama, and I’d love to show you how.
First, let’s talk about the elephant in the room.
Why might your child be drawn to snacking in the first place?
Why Your Toddler Wants Snacks All the Time
If your child is constantly raiding the panty or asking for snacks on repeat, there’s likely reasons behind these behaviors.
Here are three of the common reasons why your child might want to frequently snack or prefer snacks to eating a meal:
Simplicity and Safety
More often than not, children are often expected to eat foods that may be beyond their level of comfort.
For example, getting a child to eat vegetables may be a struggle for many parents.
Vegetables have been hailed as the holy grail of nutritious foods, and some parents may unintentionally impose pressure-to-eat feeding tactics on their kids to try to get them to eat “healthier” foods.
While well-intentioned, pressuring, bribing, or coercing kids to eat certain foods in the name of health, can actually make mealtimes much more stressful for them.
Research has shown that pressure-to-eat feeding tactics (either positive or negative) can actually cause a child to develop an aversion to eating the foods you want them to eat.
This can include things like:
Praising or rewarding a child for eating certain foods (or eating in general)
Requiring that a child takes a certain number of bites of food
Offering incentive to have dessert if foods are eaten
Many times, I see kids resorting to and/or wanting snacks when mealtimes feel stressful for them or when the foods they see at the table feel unsafe.
Often snack foods, be it fruit, crackers, or anything in between, may be easier for a child to manage and more enjoyable for them to eat, so naturally, they’ll gravitate toward them in place of foods that might feel more challenging. This may be especially true for a child with sensory sensitivities, where certain flavors and textures can become overwhelming to manage.
Many snack foods offer a sense of safety to a child with their simpler textures and flavors, which can be a common reason why kids might naturally gravitate toward them. This is a common reason I usually see kids asking for snacks, especially right after a meal.
They may not have identified anything safe or simple at the table and may be inclined to reach for a safer food, especially if the mealtime included foods that were outside their comfort zone.
Solution:
Remember that your kids need to eat foods on their terms, not yours. Now, this doesn’t mean you should give up on exposing your child to a variety of different foods, even foods that might be outside of their comfort zone.
The key is this two-fold strategy to use specifically at mealtimes: 1) Offer a variety of foods, including those they are learning to eat, without any outside interference or pressure to get them to eat those foods. 2) Include 1-2 food components at mealtimes that your child feels comfortable with. This way, your child will identify something familiar at the table that helps her feel safe.
2. The Satisfaction Factor:
In many cases, kids may be asking for and/or wanting snacks due to lack of overall satisfaction.
What I mean by this involves a couple different things:
Part One - Lack of Nutrients
For example, if your child hasn’t eaten enough at mealtimes or isn’t getting a variety of foods to meet their nutrient needs, this might be expressed as an increased desire to snack.
Think about it like this: Have you ever had a day where you just grazed on snacks rather than sit down to eat a full meal? How do you usually feel by the end of the day?
Most people won’t feel quite satisfied grazing on snacks alone, and there’s usually that feeling of, “I need something else”. Having a meal usually offers a better balance of foods and a variety of nutrients that helps cue the satisfaction factor in the brain. Similarly, if you’ve grazed on snacks all day, you may not feel totally hungry for a meal when you do finally sit down to eat.
Kids are the same way. If kids are primarily snacking and not necessarily getting enough at mealtimes, it can actually increase their desire to snack MORE, which is their bodies’ attempt to get more nutrients to cue satisfaction. In many ways, it’s kind of a catch 22: a loose structure around snacking will usually influence a child to eat less at meals; eating less at mealtimes can influence a child to snack more.
Solution:
One important way to help address this issue is to try to stick to a meal and snack schedule with your child. This doesn’t mean you need to be rigid or strict. It means holding boundaries with your child around food.
Remember, when it comes to feeding your child, you are responsible for the what, when, and where of feeding. If your child has free range access to your pantry and fridge at all times of the day, this will create dysregulation and chaos around food for her.
By having consistent and regular meal and snack times, you will actually help your child better regulate her appetite so that she can come to mealtimes hungry (but not starving). Kids are more apt to eat at mealtimes if they have an appetite to do so.
Again, when a child is allowed to graze all day, this can make it difficult for her to feel hungry when it comes to mealtime, giving her less of an appetite for the foods that might actually help her feel better satisfied.
Part Two - Lack of Access and Exposure to Snack Foods
Many times, kids are preoccupied with snacking or snack-type foods because they haven’t had enough exposure or access to the foods they might really enjoy eating.
As most kids are by nature, they’re naturally drawn toward having the very foods or things that aren’t allowed, or even that are allowed or that might be tightly controlled or restricted.
Take snack foods, for example.
If your child only occasionally gets to have snacks like crackers, cookies, etc. but really enjoys these foods and frequently asks for more of them, this could be a sign that she hasn’t had enough exposure to them
Or in other words, your child may not have frequent enough access to these foods to trust that they are a regular part of her future.
It’s not uncommon for parents to feel worried when they see their kids take special interest or excitement in foods that may be deemed less “healthy”. Maybe you’ve done this with your own child?
For example, if you see your child enjoying cookies, you might worry they’ll eat too many to the point that this might negatively affect her health. The same could be said about virtually any popular packaged and processed kids’ snack foods.
What’s important to remember is that your child’s appetite can be trusted, and your child needs space to learn how to listen to her body and eat in a manner that helps her feel satisfied.
No matter how subtle or well-intentioned, restrictive feeding practices can actually make your child feel more preoccupied with the very foods you are trying to control.
In addition, attempting to control, limit, or restrict snack foods can actually cause your child to overeat them in the long-run.
So if you notice that your child is particularly preoccupied with having or eating a certain snack food, whatever it might be, the solution is not to limit exposure.
If that’s not the answer, then what would be more effective?
Solution:
Allowing adequate access to the snack foods your child might repeatedly ask for is an important part of helping her feel satisfied (and not constantly asking for more).
If your child seems particularly preoccupied with having certain snack foods that have been previously restricted, know that it might take some time of regular access to normalize how she feels about those foods.
Eventually when your child can trust that the foods she enjoys are available, she will normalize how she feels about those foods.
So does this mean that snack foods should be a free-for-all and that your child should get access to anything she wants, whenever she wants?
No, not exactly.
Remember - as the parent, you are still in charge of the what, when, and where of meals and snack times.
However, it’s important to check your hidden agenda in order to more regularly incorporate foods that your child may want to eat. Part of building a trusting feeding relationship with your child is to be considerate of her food preferences while not catering to her every demand.
This might look like offering your child’s desired snack food along with other foods that you’d like to include.
For example, let’s say your child is really excited about chips, is constantly asking for them and wanting to snack on them.
You could offer chips at snack time along with milk and sliced fruit. In this way, you’ve included a food preference, one that your child may be focused on lately, along with other food components that you’ve decided to serve (the milk and fruit).
The important thing is to present all foods equal and allow you child to decide what to eat from the foods you’ve offered and how much they want to eat.
So if she ends up just eating the chips and nothing else from the rest of the snack? That’s OKAY.
She may be excited about a particular food for a while before slowly and gradually losing interest in it and exploring other foods.
This will happen over time with consistency in your approach to feeding, one that is based on TRUST in your child to self-regulate her appetite with the foods you’ve provided.
If you find that your child continues to be fixated on a particular snack food, try serving that food multiple times throughout the week within your scheduled meals and snacks.
Repeated exposure alongside other foods can again, help your child feel more neutral about that food.
YES - it’s okay for your child to eat the same thing, whatever snack food it might be, multiple times during the week.
In fact, this is an important and necessary step in order to help your child feel at ease with this food and to not further any preoccupation with it.
You might also consider offering periodic times where you offer an unlimited quantity of any given snack food that your child may be preoccupied with.
I know that may seem counterintuitive - give your child MORE access to the very food she wants to eat?
YES.
Here’s why: remember that any form of restriction or limiting can actually make your child more drawn to those foods.
When your child trusts that she has reliable access and knows that YOU trust her to eat what her body needs, she won’t eat in a way that is out-of-control or counter to what her body needs to thrive.
This might look like offering a larger portion of a snack food and allowing your child to eat as much as she wants until she feels content. For example, if your child seems to be fixated on chips or crackers, you can put out a bowl for snack alongside 1-2 other foods and let your child decide how much she wants to eat from what you’ve provided.
Many parents fear letting go of this element of control. It’s easier to dish out a specific portion of a snack food that your child is allowed to eat.
However, you can’t allow your discomforts around food or appetite dictate how your child eats.
Your child may need a bigger portion of any given snack food in order to feel content, satisfied and move on with her day. That portion might be larger than what you feel comfortable with, but at the end of the day, you’re not living in your child’s body.
It’s not your job to decide how much your child needs to eat. It’s your job to decide what foods you’re going to offer and to be sure to be considerate of her food needs without catering to her every demand.
To better help your own child and to support her in building a positive relationship with food, it’s important to check your own feelings that come up around food. Does it make you uncomfortable, anxious or scared to see your child eating certain foods or portions?
If so, pay attention to those feelings and explore where they may be coming from. In the meantime, avoid projecting those feelings on your child so you can create space for her to build positive associations with food and learn to trust her own body (rather than rely on external regulators).
If you need more support with kids and desserts, be sure to check out this article: Kids Candy: Growing Healthy Children Need to Eat Candy, Too
3. Lack of Structure with Meals and Snacks
As I’ve mentioned before, when kids don’t have any structure with meals and snacks and if food is just a free-for-all, this can fuel the snack-attacks.
One lovely mother that I worked with had a child that was on the lower end of the growth percentiles. While he was growing steadily, his pediatrician made a comment to her at one of his well checks, telling her that she should try to “squeeze” some extra calories in him to help with his weight.
Naturally, this set off an alarm in mom’s brain, and she began to worry that her son wasn’t eating enough (even though his steady growth indicated otherwise). Every time her son would say, “I’m hungry, I want a snack!”, she would drop everything to meet his demands.
If he didn’t eat much at dinner, she dragged out his bedtime to try to get another snack in him. If he said he was hungry while he was in bed, she’d worry if he’d eaten enough earlier in the day. She began to let him dictate the what, when, and where of eating because she was concerned he wasn’t eating enough for his growth and weight. Needless to say, this became a stressful way of living.
In another situation, a mother I knew gave her kids free-reign access to the fridge and pantry at all times because she was worried about them feeling deprived or restricted.
As a child, she remembered her own parents keeping locks on the fridge and pantry and feeling extremely deprived when it came to accessing food in her own home.
As a result, she took a relaxed approach to food with her own kids, allowing them to eat whatever they wanted whenever they pleased. However, she started to run into issues with her kids not wanting to eat at mealtimes, and food just felt chaotic for everyone in the family.
While these are more extreme examples, let’s not forget to mention the most common reasons why it’s hard to maintain structure around food with kids: our kids, themselves!
For the sake of keeping it real, it’s hard to say no to a kid who’s throwing a tantrum and screaming bloody murder for a snack. It’s easier to give in to our kids’ demands in order to keep the peace in the family - even for a minute.
Not to mention, mama is tired, am I right? When you’re juggling multiple responsibilities and kids, it’s easier to pacify your child with food and give in to what’s wanted in the moment rather than risk an all-out disruption.
Maintaining and holding boundaries around food with kids isn’t easy, but it’s a necessary component to help them develop a positive relationship with food and their bodies.
It’s important to keep this big picture goal in mind when you’re locked into food negotiations with your child who is breaking you down with her words, glares, screams, and stares.
And while your child does have an innate ability to self-regulate their intake and appetite, she needs your help setting loving and firm boundaries in order to be able to do so. Just like with discipline, sleep routines, going to school and doing homework, and all the other things that help our kids thrive, they need guidance and direction. If we let them rule the roost based on how they feel at any given moment - oye! It’s safe to say the whole entire family will suffer.
Think about creating consistent structure around meals and snacks for your child like using the bumper rails for the kids at the bowling alley: you’re helping your kids stay in their lane and keeping them out of the frustrating gutter when you can give them a strong support system.
Solution:
So what does this look like practically?
While you can’t keep bumper rails around your child at all times (wouldn’t that be something?), you can offer boundaries and structure, especially around food.
This doesn’t mean being rigid and impractical.
This simply means creating a routine around food that can help your child better regulate her appetite and have a predictable rhythm to eating.
The important thing is to create a routine that works best for family.
Ideally, spacing out meals and snacks every couple of hours can be helpful for both sustaining your child’s energy and nutrient needs.
This can also help them come to meals with more of an appetite to eat. Remember that when a child is just allowed to graze and snack all day, this makes them less likely to eat at actual mealtimes.
Lastly, creating a structure with meals and snacks can also help you defer when your child is asking for food.
Let’s say your child asks you for a snack or says she’s hungry, and it’s in-between one of your designated meal or snack times, you can help your child understand that an opportunity to eat is coming soon.
For example, you can tell your child something along the lines of, “I know you’d really like that snack right now. We’re going to be having snack time after we get back from the library, and you can have it then!”
This goes over much better for a child (and mama!) when you can defer your child’s request, rather than meet them with a steadfast, “No - not now”.
For more support in creating a mealtime routine for you and your family, be sure to check out this blog post here: “Build Healthy Habits For Kids With a Feeding Schedule”
Tips/Solutions for Approaching Your Kids’ Snack Time in a Positive Way
At the end of the day, food is just food. It’s easy to get sucked into a battle of the wills with kids around snack foods in particular, but really, this can be another opportunity for you to support them in building positive experiences with food and learning to trust their bodies.
Keep these tips in mind as you approach snacking and snack foods with your own child, whatever your situation may be:
Understand that no foods are morally superior than others: Remember, mama, it’s more important to focus on the quality of your child’s experiences around foods rather than the food itself. At the end of the day, what matters most is not the minutiae of nutrition but a trusting and positive feeding relationship between you and your child. This isn’t possible if you push your agenda on your child about what foods you think they should or shouldn’t eat. Continue to offer a variety of all foods without any pressure to eat certain foods.
Use positive language: On the same token of keeping foods neutral, it’s important to be mindful of how we talk about food, especially snack food, in front of our kids. This is where diet culture’s influence can come in heavily. It may be easy to describe processed, packaged snacks that kids love as “unhealthy”, “bad”, or “junk”; however, kids can interpret this to mean that they’re bad if they eat those foods. This can internalize a guilt-shame-cycle around eating, which can be a risk factor for more problems down the road, like disordered eating. Instead, keep your language neutral or positive, if possible. While it’s really never necessary to comment or talk about food, if you find yourself needing to do so, stick with the characteristics about food instead. You might say, “These crackers are crunchy!”, or “What colors do you notice in this food?”. This can help keep eating a positive and curious experience for your child.
Use activities as a time reference: It’s easy to tell kids, “Later!” when they’ve asked for something for the millionth time (ahem - I’m totally guilty of that! Stop nagging me, kid!). However, kids don’t understand time in the same manner we do. So to help more appropriately defer their requests, especially for snacks, try to use activities as a time reference. For example, saying, “After your nap, we’ll eat this for a snack”, or “When we get back from dance class, we’ll be having dinner.” In this way, your child can better understand what’s coming and will be less likely to keep nagging you. Win-win!
Integrating snacks with meals: As mentioned earlier, if your child feels particularly preoccupied or strongly about having a certain snack, then let that snack make an appearance at dinner time or other mealtimes. This approach can help normalize that food for your child. Snack foods are just food, and there’s no rule saying you can only have them for a snack. Include them as part of meals to help your child neutralize how they feel about those foods.
Having a kitchen closed policy: If you’re implementing a schedule around meals and snacks, you’ll inevitably find that kids will test your boundaries and push your buttons to see how far they can get. Remind kids that the kitchen is closed between meals and snacks when you find them mingle toward the fridge and pantry and that food will be available soon.
Give options when possible: If you have a child with a strong opinion about snack foods, let your child have the option to choose. This gives your child autonomy and helps them feel a sense of independence. I would personally recommend limiting it to 2 options so as not to overwhelm your child. You can say something along the lines of, “We’re having a snack soon. Would you like to have crackers or pretzels with your hummus?” This lets your child know that you care about her opinions, too.
Making peace with kids’ snacks: As mentioned, diet culture has demonized snacking and kids’ snacks to the point of fear and anxiety. Many parents may worry about their kids eating these foods. If you are a mother who has had a difficult relationship with food, you might be especially sensitive to snack foods in your home. Maybe you prefer to steer away from these foods because you don’t trust yourself to eat them and have strict restrictions on them being in your home. Or maybe you’re following a certain diet that doesn’t allow you to eat the snack foods that your kids love, so you just keep them out of the house altogether. Being aware of this is a critical step to helping you better help your kids. Remember that when it comes to food, our kids will pick up on any anxieties or fears we may have about food, even if they’re unspoken. Working to make peace with these foods and build trust in yourself and your body can be empowering for your kids to develop a positive relationship with food as well. Healing your relationship with food can right the cycle for your kids and help them also feel at peace and ease with food and their bodies. If you’re feeling stuck in this area, check out the Intuitive Eating 101 Guide as a place to start thinking about how you feel about food. By making peace with these foods and trusting yourself to eat them, you’ll be able to extend that trust to your children. Remember that diet culture demonizes kids’ snack foods and it’s important to challenge this message in order to help our child build a positive relationship with all foods and feel confident about eating what feels best in her body.
Using Snacks to Help Optimize Nutrition and Promote a Positive Relationship With All Food
The most important work is building the foundation for a positive approach to feeding. Once you’ve got that down, you can layer it with some consideration to food and nutrition. Just keep in mind that the what of kids’ snacks is not nearly as important as how you feed your children.
Remember that snacks are appropriate for growing kids and a helpful way to support your child’s overall nutrition needs. You can structure snacks in a way that supports their needs while also helping them feel good about eating a variety of foods.
Keep the above tips in mind to help you stay focused on the big picture as you support your children’s ability to have a positive relationship with food and their bodies.
Now I’d love to hear from YOU. What are some snacking scenarios that you might run into with your own child?